How should parents guide their children who love to lie?

Children lying does not necessarily mean they are bad kids, so parents should not easily label their children. Children at different stages have different perceptions of lying, and most children do not lie to hurt others. So how should parents correctly guide their children to lie?

Why Children Lie

Unrealistic lies: Children aged 1-3 are still in their early childhood and cannot distinguish between reality and fantasy, so their lies are actually the product of their own imagination. They are unrealistic lies.

Not related to honesty: This situation has little to do with honesty. Teachers and parents do not need to pay attention to children's lies in early childhood, as long as they can give them some guidance.

Imagination as reality: Children aged 3-5 years old tell lies. Children at this age often take imaginary things as reality. These fabricated lies are more like simple performances or their own wishful thinking. They may say that they know a TV star or have strange encounters with some cartoon characters.

Construct a scenario together: The solution is that if your child says something that you think is irrelevant, don’t directly break his imagination. You can even follow his thinking and construct a beautiful scenario with him.

What should parents do when children lie?

Re-understand yourself: When children aged 12-18 lie, first of all, we need to enhance their self-awareness and help and inspire them to re-understand what they have done and where they have exaggerated or distorted the truth.

Give approval and affirmation: When children tell the truth, you should approve and affirm their honest attitude. Guide them to realize that lying is shameful. Let children know that lies will always be exposed and lying will only be punished more severely.

Education by words and deeds: Parents are the first teachers of their children. They should teach their children by words and deeds, and let them realize that any form of dishonesty is immoral. Let children remember deeply that lying is a shameful thing.

Democratic family atmosphere: The family environment has a profound impact on children. A democratic and harmonious family atmosphere makes children respect and trust their parents, and they will not make up lies for fear of their parents. This will effectively prevent children from lying.

Children lie, parents pay attention

Initial social awareness: Children aged 5-12 years old lie. Children of this age sometimes lie because they consider other people's feelings or do not want to hurt others, which means that children have initial social awareness.

No intentional harm: Children lie because they cannot achieve a certain ability and do not want to disappoint their parents or be punished. They often do not do so to intentionally hurt others. Parents should not easily equate their children’s lying behavior with their children’s quality.

Don’t label children arbitrarily: Don’t label children as “liar” or “liar expert” just because they lied once. Doing so will not only not help children get rid of the habit of lying, but will also strengthen their lying behavior.

Instill the concept of honesty: The right thing to do is to communicate more with your children and let them realize that "honesty is a virtue and a noble quality, and that honesty will also reduce the degree of punishment for mistakes."