How to praise children correctly, what are the principles and techniques

Praise is like a stimulant for children, which can boost their self-confidence and even build a good mentality for the future. But what many parents don’t know is that praise also requires skills and the right way. If you praise blindly, it may have a counter-effect on the child’s personality.

The Wrong Way to Praise Your Child

Always praise easily: Parents often say to their children - you are great, because every detail of the child's growth is worthy of praise, so whether the baby can smile, roll over and crawl, or talk and walk, etc., it makes parents feel surprised in their hearts, so they always speak with a tone of praise.

The disadvantages of casual praise: Parents always give casual praise, and in principle they don’t think about the possible negative effects. But maybe one day, parents will find that their children seem to be easily afraid and panic about setbacks or failures, and seem to have poor stress resistance.

Unclear praise: If parents always praise their children in a general way, it is easy for the children to feel at a loss. When praising children, it is necessary to be more specific and specific. Only with specific and targeted praise can the children understand and know what direction or things they should work hard on in the future.

Bad language habits: Many parents often praise their children for their intelligence, and it may even become a habitual expression. However, if every progress is defined in terms of intelligence, it will only make the child think that good grades are equal to intelligence, which may make the child more proud rather than confident.

Praising character rather than facts: Some sentences are actually just typical compliments on personality, such as: good child, etc. Parents always unconsciously say these words, but in fact this is a rather abstract concept for children, and children are prone to feel ambiguous.

Increase invisible pressure: In fact, being praised constantly will make you feel very happy at first, but pressure will appear over time. It is an invisible burden, and you may even slowly start to not want perfection.

Excessive praise: If parents often exaggerate their praise, children will resist, thinking that they are unworthy of such praise, and will instead make trouble and do something strange.

The right way to praise your child

Pay attention to the child's efforts: Parents should try to give specific encouragement. Of course, they must first be clear about what the child has done, and even be able to see with their own eyes the child's good intentions and seriousness. At this time, they can carefully describe the behavior they have seen, which will be more convincing.

Don't give perfunctory praise: Occasionally parents will give casual or even perfunctory and absent-minded praise for their children's performance. Children will be very sensitive to this, so never give praise without intention, as this will hurt the children's heart.

Encourage and praise in advance: Parents can also try to praise their children before they do something, as a preventive measure to show affirmation, which can also achieve unexpected results.

The impact of correct praise on children

Increase children's self-confidence: Everyone needs to be affirmed. When children are praised, they will feel affirmed invisibly, so they will have self-confidence, and it will be easier for them to be confident when doing things and they will not be easily defeated.

Influence on children's behavior: Children who are affirmed are more likely to behave positively and optimistically. On the contrary, children who are often denied are more likely to be pessimistic and negative.

Improve parent-child relationships: Children who are often praised by their parents will agree more with what their parents say, and will care more about family and kinship. This can improve the relationship between parents and children and warm up their feelings.

Affects learning motivation: Children who are often praised are more willing to take risks and try new things, so they will be more proactive in learning and usually have better grades. If a child is often scolded and denied, it will easily affect his mentality of learning new things.